Yesterday was a real “treat!” We arrived at my niece and nephew’s home to celebrate their daughter’s graduation — You could smell the sugar emanating from the desserts that covered the table — the VERY LARGE table. I swear, every leaf was used to extend the length of it, and every inch was filled with a confectionary. Brownies, cookies, and pies — OH MY! It was a killer to this T2D sugar addict.
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I’m serious. Every inch. The obligatory graduation cake was the centerpiece, surrounded by more desserts than I could count. Of course, the brownies called my name, and I didn’t hesitate. Actually, I didn’t hesitate — TWICE! Luckily, they were cut into a reasonable size, which helped to alleviate my guilt. Somehow, a homemade chocolate chip cookie found it’s way into my mouth. How does that happen? 🙂 Okay, I know how it gets there. By the way, there was a bowl of fruit on the table. It was colorful, but didn’t “catch my attention…” Carbs reigned!
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This was to be a low key gathering, just dessert, coffee, etc., so we stopped at a diner and caught a bite, before going — just a sandwich, no big deal.
I planned my eating for the day, so I was careful not to munch before leaving home. It was fine. It could’ve been a LOT worse, but gone are those days. Thank you God!
I’ve been doing THIS for a long time! You’d thing going out for dinner wouldn’t be a big deal. Ha! MOST OF THE TIME, it isn’t, but if I’m in a funk, I tend to want to eat dessert first —- life is short, after all… When I’m okay (thinking positively), it’s not a problem. Then, there are those days when I convince myself that I’m making much ado about nothing.
“SUGAR BEAST”
Truth. It’s NOT nothing. T2D is not a joke, not something to be dismissed. So, in as much as I want to let that evil Sugar Beast in, I’m NOT going to. Evil *!@#!***
I really think that waaaay back, when I was first diagnosed, I convinced myself that I’d handle this “diabetes nonsense” and move on with my life. How naive was I? I knew then, and I still am acutely aware that Type 2 Diabetes is here to stay, and the harder I fight it, the worse I feel.
I used the word feel, because it isn’t only a physical issue, it’s also an emotional one. That’s the hardest part for me. I’m definitely a “stress eater,” My emotions send my appetite into high gear, when life hits the fan.
We all have choices! For me, making a conscious decision to choose wisely is where it all starts. I need to:
STOP —- Slow down and get a grip
THINK —-What outcome do I want from my decision?
BREATHE —-Deep breaths are imperative in order to stop and think before making an important decision.
Yes, eating that piece of cake is an important choice. It’s trivial to non-diabetics, but for me, it’s imperative to do the right thing. Most of the time, choosing to have dessert is not the end of the world (in my case), but importantly, I don’t want that decision to be the one that sends me over the cliff.
Seriously. I’ve been able to treat my diabetes with diet, exercise, and one medication. Pretty good, I’m told. Here’s the thing — making a lifestyle out of eating the wrong things, lack of exercise, and failing to take my medication properly, WILL send me on the road to insulin. I don’t want that!
I don’t consider taking a little more insulin, or an extra pill, will make it okay for any diabetic to “cheat” on decisions regarding food choices. That’s a game I don’t want to play because, I know that I won’t come out the winner. I’m VERY competitive. If it’s between me and diabetes —- trust me, I’LL WIN! I’ll succeed each and every day, by using the tools that I have.
Lately, I’ve been having difficulty with food choices. Ugh, it’s a killer. But, I’m living one day at a time, one choice at a time, and relief is on it’s way. I feel it. That cloud is starting to lift, if ever so slowly. I’m fighting to be able to follow the healthy road I’ve chosen for myself.
No need to rush —- slowly, carefully, I’m getting back on track. I CAN DO IT — and so can you.
Diary of a Dedicated Diabetic 